thinking, good...plans, bad?

so...this is what happens when i've suddenly regained energy after a day of being sleepy. apparently going to bed at midnight (not bad) and rising at 7:00 to finish studying leaves me tired for the day but awake after not having class for 3 hours. How I love being one of those people that's more awake after 10 pm.

I finally bought my plane ticket to Paris.

I may be getting a real job this summer...for 2 months. Let's see if I can swing this. My summer: 1. Paris 2. work/EC in Fresno/college visits??? Then again, I could use a relaxing summer. I didn't have that last year.

I miss AW. This is the week he is decidedly absent. Twice in the past 5 days DJ and I asked the inevitable question-

"Is he still alive?"

We've been leaving him random notes and missing posters. I enjoy spontaneity like that.

On the plus side (for me) he has been officially rejected from Roosevelt's grad school program. It brings him one step closer to following me through finishing his undergrad business degree. If I go to Portland, he goes...Minneapolis, same. But he and I prefer Portland. I've ruled out NY in the back of my head. One, it doesn't appeal as much. Two, it is probably a long shot. My grades aren't that good. I despise this not knowing. I half know....and it drives me crazy. At least I'm sure I'm not coming back to good ol' RC.

Newfound irony: it wouldn't break me up if I became a modified version of my parents. This prospect used to bother me for a number of years up until.....2006. Last night he spoke of trying URTA's after a year. That thought made me really selfish because I thought he would stay wherever until I graduated. That's looking at about 3 years. Perhaps he'll move when I go abroad for a semester and that would make the transition easier. Off topic, oops- anywho, I'm ok with him waiting and us staying together going wherever we need to go career-wise. The other makes it work in whatever city. Eventually we'd figure out if we still want to get married or not.

(It seems I've figured out a different kind of 5 year plan. Is this bad??)

Yesss????

My life should not be about 5 year plans. I'd rather think in broad possibilities about my future. If I can't be sure about majors and careers, let's turn to my current relationship evolving from something serious to major life commitment. Good idea? Maybe not when I'm not even 20. I do cringe everytime I hear another classmate of mine is engaged/married/pregnant. I'm still very young.

So...plans? Short term is ok (after all, I do have to figure out my summer and my next school). But I still have until the end of this semester to have a general plan.

In the meantime....